hello wello play me a tune.

i’m taking time out of my busy busy night to write this.

so i was walking down orchard that saturday, snapping pictures for my portfolio, which i was doing on street musicians, and i just noticed the vast difference in the buskers i saw.
let me show you what i mean.

there’s this type,

then there’s this type.

one is struggling, using his music as a means to survive, and the other, plays it because it makes them feel good.

one playing to stay alive, the other to feel alive.

one of the harmonica playing uncles called me over when i was taking his picture.

uncle: “what you want boy? take photo for what?”

me: “school project uncle, for project.”

uncle: “project ah, not complain ah.”

me: “complain?”

uncle: “yah lah, some kaypoh see people put money they not happy go complain… *mumbles*”

me: “dont worry uncle, no problem.”

even when they’re already struggling, people still have to make things difficult for them.

i want to be a musician.

i wonder which kind i’ll be.

fishcakes;

seems like i haven’t have much time recently.

end of term is approaching, and i haven’t had enough time to sit down and go through all my assignments, most of which i have to submit by tomorrow.

either i’m coming home too late, too sleepy, or too distracted by whatever.

even now, as i’m trying to post this post, you might notice that i have no emotions whatsoever in these words, no feelings. i’m kinda dead as i write this.

SO TIRED, mygosh.

i promise i’ll come back with another post soon. one that rocks. i hope.

larris

tututs and champagne;

workload mounting and commitments not leaving any breathing room, or extra sleep. got to catch up on sleep on long bus rides, and miss the stops horribly.

thanks god term is coming to an end.

jodie speaks; well, at least she tries.

hello guys.i went shooting yesterday, for photography assignment.

http://zwonkymonk.multiply.com/photos/album/4/photo_assignment_24508

i used ben’s FM to shoot, and i’m pretty proud of the shots, even though most were a lil’ overexposed.

anyway, when i came back from shooting, guess what!

my mom found my dad’s really old slr, that he kept for years and years since he lost his interest about 10 years back. it’s a nikon fg, and i promptly named it JODIE. (not zeta pi jodi!)

so jodie and i have become quite good friends, but jodie has been really sad.

she has been kept in a dank, dark bag for more than 10 years, neglected and unwanted (thank god mom didnt sell it the the karanguni), and spoilt in certain areas.

her prime lens, cracked.

her mirror reflex, jammed.

her telephoto lens, FUNGUS, eugh.

but i still love her though. even though the repairs could cost up to $400, i still would keep her.

it just reveals a different side of my dad to me. now he’s all reserved, working as a technician, humble and contrite, but he used to be so ARTY FARTY, he used to be a photographer, he used to own a modelling agency, etc.

my dad wasn’t cool, he IS cool.

and i like.

SO! jodie WILL be repaired, and she will be my primary cam. sorry sharris, but you’re experimental. (:

sorry guys, no emo post this time.

larris

dabomb.

so i’m sitting here, playing some games on my mac, i’m trying my best to kill that blasted level 23 alchemist who has been bullying my creeps into submission, when he blinks behind me and delivers the killing blow.

thats it! command and q i press, and then i wipe my face.

ouch, it was only then i remembered i was having a major breakout on my face.

acne breakout that is.

but i’m not here to talk bout how ugly it is making my face, but rather the cause of it.

i’ve been keeping regularly late nights since about two weeks ago, each night staying up until about 2 am. either i’m rushing assignments, trying to study for tests, or i’m just talking to some new person i’ve met. well, some new girl i’ve met. call me a flirt, whatever, but you wouldn’t expect me to stay up all the way to 2 am talking to guys right?

other than that, i’ve been coming home late from school everyday, bout tennish or elevenish. ccas, clubs, friends.

too many things to do in one day.

now, i’m sure you’ve read my first post about me wanting to not keep a low profile in ngee ann but rather “explode in a ball of furry fun”. well, thats what i’ve been doing up until now, and i guess the effects are starting to show.

eyebags.

acne breakouts.

always falling asleep on the bus.

my mom always say it isn’t healthy, and what i’m doing now, i’ll only regret it once i’m older.

but i really wonder, will i really regret what i’m doing now just because i become sickly? will i go,

“cough cough, damn, i shouldn’t have gone for dance that night and stayed until 11 at kap, laughing my head off, then going home and helping my friend get over her boyfriend. boy, was i sure stupid.”

no, i don’t think so.

i’d think that i would really miss times like these, once i enter working life.

so i’ve always told my mum, i don’t think i’d regret it, i’d suffer, sure. i’d curse, yes. but i won’t regret what i’m doing here and now. no way, ho sei.

larris

the world and stuff.

hello readers.

guess what larris has dropped by to talk about today. life and death.

although this subject is pretty much cliched and stuff, i still have the nagging feeling that this post will bring you or me to a higher understanding of life and death.

NOT.

just kidding.

so today (yesterday, seeing as how its 2 in the a.m.) was mother’s day, and it was pretty shitty, shall not go into details, but i made this comment to alot of my friends today,

“today is the most fucked day of my life.”

but why? because i’ve just lost everything i owned in a fire? because my fiancee just died in a car accident on the way to the wedding? because my wife just had a miscarriage? no, not even close.

it causes me to think about how easy it is say things you don’t mean bout life in general.

one very common example;

“go and die lah.”

whoa shit. if you take a moment to think about those four words, what you’re actually saying is this: “get out of my life, you’re dead to me, you don’t exist to me anymore.”

which can lead me to talk about existentialism and all, but i’ll save that for another time.

anyway, “go and die lah”, “omg i wish i were dead”, “your mother died”,

all these words, we use them without really knowing what we’re saying. people these days have a very vague concept about death and the significance of life.

abortion, murder, child abuse, drug abusing, wrist cutting, body alterations… the list goes on.

have we become a species that is destructive to itself?

everyday we wake up, and forget the very fact that, we’re alive. hey, we’re alive, WE’RE FUCKING ALIVE.

people die by the thousands every second, and i’m still here, but guess what? i dont give a flying shit!

is this what we have become?

everyday i see more and more reports about terrorism, murders, people dying, and dying and dying.

its makes me think of the significance of the act of killing with intentions and motives.

does it really work? killing one to save another?

i dont think so, because the atomic bomb sure didn’t solve the war. open your eyes and ears, and you’ll realize that even in the peace and serenity of singapore today, some other country is either warring with another, or even warring within itself.

what are we.

as humans.

God said we are the caretakers of this world. but what are we doing to the world? we are KILLING it.

God said we are to be the caretakers of all the other living beings. but? we trade endangered species, poach elephants for their ivory, shoot tigers and rhinos for their medicinal purposes.

God said alot of things, but hey, we dont listen anymore.

of course this is all generalization.

but just think about it. if every single human being on this earth woke up one morning, slapped themselves in the face and go, “whoa! i breathe, i eat, i drink, i’m not alone, i’m ALIVE.” and proceed to slap every other person they see and say the same thing, i’m positive the world will be a better place.

“Be careful little feet where you go
For it’s the little feet behind you that are sure to follow”

remember kids, SIX DEGREES CAN CHANGE THE WORLD.

good night.

(to think this was supposed to be a post about some girl. LOL have fun reading leslie!)

ambitions, vocations, and the in-betweens.

just came back from a three day retreat/camp with the leaders of amplify ministry.

and decided to do a reflection on something that struck me during the camp.

fr william goh was giving a sermon about ambition and vocation, and he explained the difference between ambition, and vocation.

so,

AMBITION VS. VOCATION.

what is the definition of either one of them? ambition is the call or desire to do something from within, whilst vocation is the call to do God’s work, from withOUT, from God himself.

so it just propelled me to think about it. i knew my vocation, and that is to give myself to serve others, through my ministry. but, what exactly is my ambition? musician, photographer, film-maker, and whatevernot.

what exactly do i want in life? i mean, i joined film, sound and video for a reason. but somehow, i cant remember the exact reason.

“i want to reach out to people, through my movies and my work.” i remember saying something of that sort during my JPSAE interview. that much still remains, wholly and surely.

i want to inspire people to be all that they can be. through art, music, etc. i mean, thats why i joined this line, because i dont really think it’s gonna be that easy to inspire many lives if you’re an engineer.

i guess i’m pretty much a people person. put me on an island alone, and i’ll probably freak out alot worse than tom hanks in cast away.

gives me much to think about. not a very nice post, nor is it one that will score me an A, but it just really made me think.

guys, what are your ambitions? why not put it down in my comments.

larrris.

say hello, sharris;

i know, i did say that i would be getting my holga on monday, but guess what.

say hello to sharris, my latest baby, the holga135blackcorner. (don’t ask about the name.)

it was ready for collection yesterday already, so why the hell should i wait?

i went to collect it during photography outing, we were around bugis so i left the group together with ben and li, and went to burlington square’s triple d. collected the camera, bought film, jammed the roll into the camera, and started shooting.

we proceeded to get lost, we were supposed to meet up with the others at haji lane, which i must say is a nice place, but we ended up walking in effing circles round the place. we took about almost 2 hours before we met up and i almost burnt through my entire first roll of film.

well, i’ve already sent it for processing, shall upload the pictures to photobucket, deviantart and my lomohome later. i shall post the links here, and my fav pic.

look for it!

loves, larris.

click.

hello readers.

guess what. i’ve ordered my camera, the holga 135BC, off the online store, http://8storeytree.com, and i’ll be heading down to triple d on monday to collect it (don’t wana pay for postage and wana check the cam first).

i’ve been bitten recently by the photobug, or more accurately, the LOMO bug. what’s a lomo? you ask.

story cut short, its a russian camera that has expanded into a huge company, taking cool cameras and refurbishing them, and other stuff as well.

anyway, i’ve always had this keen interest in photography, but never really jumped onto it until my friend showed me his lomo lc-a+ (lomo compact automat). a film camera, shockingly simple, but marvelous enough to get me totally head over heels in love with photography.

sounds pretty extremist, but since then, i’ve been researching so much about lomos and holgas, and what not. i’ve even joined the photography club in ngee ann poly.

there’s such something different about lomography (photography using lomos) and film photography in general that draws me to it, much more so than digital photography. ask me why.

“why?” you ask.

why? well, the quality of film, for one thing, completely overshadows that of the digital image. digital images uses pixels, which in my opinion, isn’t quite as remarkable as film (although usually i’d upload the film photos into the computer, therefore rendering it to pixels. contradictive much?).

another thing would be the value of the shots. with modern technology today, you can’t walk down orchard road without seeing at least 5 people carrying DSLRs (digital single-lens reflex), and usually contained in these DSLRs are the wonders of technology, and also the 4GB memory card, which gives the photographer an ass load of shooting.

the film camera, however, uses film (DUH). each roll of film allows you 36 shots. and might i remind you that a roll of normal 35mm film these days costs about six bucks in vivocity. because you only have 36 shots, each shot would mean more to you than a thousand shots from a DSLR. of course, this is subjective, your opinion may differ from mine.

there’s just a different feeling when you collect those prints from the photo lab, it gives me a whole lot more satisfaction when you go through the 36 prints and find about 10 nice shots, rather than being able to take a million photos and see whether its crappy or not straightaway (read: DSLR).

perhaps it’s the anticipation that makes it fun. after all, they always say good things are worth waiting for.

i remember my first camera. before the days of digital convenience, way back in 1998 (or is it 1999, 2000?). i was in the phillipines at that time, visiting my family. and i got my first camera as a free toy from jollibee, a fast food restaurant that makes kickass burgers. uber pawnage.

the feeling it gave me, when i took my first picture, clicked the wheel to advance the film, and to turn the thingamajig to reel back the film, and then! seeing my lousy ass pictures when it was developed (i was real young then), it can never be replaced with whatever i have today. i’ve used a canon ixus since, and not once has it filled me with the same wonder.

oh, did i mention? it was a looney toons camera. double kill!

uber cute.

so that being said.

good things are worth waiting for.

’til monday, my holga 135 black corner!

_________________________________________________

photo 1&2 source: http://lomographyasia.com

the first.

so today was FUN two thousand and eight.

and even though it is so expected already i’m still going to say it.

it was FUN.

there i said it. i came clean, now i expect lots of comments saying i’m lame and that i should totally move my carcass out of ngee ann poly.

but honestly speaking, it was real good and wholesome (okay, maybe not so wholesome) FUN.

we cheered, we screamed, we danced, and we fought, but most importantly, we BONDED.

we may have not won anything, but you know this as well as i do, we won in heart.

we won because we’ve formed friendships and come this far.

we won because we weren’t afraid to come out of our shell and yell our lungs out.

we won because we didn’t give a shit about what the other faculties thought about us, we are the fms students, dammit, and we dont give a hoot if you hate us.

OKAY, bitchy statements aside, it’s time to input some thoughts into this ramble.

now, although it was fun and all, what i realized was that you can only have as much fun as you allow yourself to.

you can’t expect to go as a spectator, sit down, stone and keep mum, and expect to have as much fun if you were going completely insane shouting your head off and trying to get the whole crowd to do the dynamite cheer with you.

speaking of the dynamite cheer, we didn’t do it all today, it was pretty depressing.

as i was saying, how much fun you get is how much you want it.

take me for example, i wasn’t going to be all quiet and low profile in ngee ann poly fms, like i was in the good old secondary school days (trust me, low profile was a good thing then.) so i had the idea in my head, that i wasn’t going to keep myself in a shell here at ngee ann, but rather explode in a ball of furry fun.

what i learnt throught the orientations i went through is that you should always be yourself, and if people don’t like it, too bad for them. because i’ve realized that one of the worse things you can do to yourself is to compromise yourself for the sake of making people accept you, when they should be accepting you for who you are.

sadly to say (or type, for this matter), many people these days are like that. with the boundaries society has set around them, they bend in to conformity and lose their identity entirely. this is why we have large “social groupings”, such as bengs, muts, lians and the like. a bunch of people conforming to the same “ideals” that they become somewhat similar.

of course, this is all just an objective point of view.

you can’t really blame all these people, no matter how fun it is. i would never know why anyone would want to be what they’re not, but i can think of plenty reasons that would come close.

1. they just don’t have enough self-confidence. either their upbringing was filled with putdowns and discouragement, or they don’t get any encouragement from their parents at all.
2. they are pressured into doing it, like if they don’t, they aren’t considered cool.

of course, i have many reasons (not), but the root of the problem always comes back to confidence.

even at fun08, you can see those who are really confident of themselves, taking the risk of putting themselves in front of so many to just to make things enjoyable.

but, overconfidence is another issue entirely. perhaps i should talk about that another time.

this is larris, signing off.

p.s.: i seriously need a shower, and school starts at 8 tomorrow *groans*, but it is 4 hours of studio production!!!! i can’t wait, seriously.